Two Years

Two years ago today, my life changed drastically. Many peoples’ lives changed drastically. It’s amazing how big a hole one person can leave. I haven’t been paying much attention to the date, to tell the truth. There have been a large number of things distracting me from remembering the significance. Some good, some bad. All […]

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Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving approaches, and as it does, I feel the need to speak again. Thanksgiving is a time of year when people are enticed to be thankful for things in their lives. I know several who are posting one thing they’re thankful for each day in November. I know that it’s a common tradition, around the […]

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Last Night I Cried

Lately, I’ve had a number of things to distract me. They’re good things, and I’m happy I have them. But I can’t help feeling that I’m ignoring the sadness, rather than dealing with it. And then I counter that argument in my head with the idea that maybe I’m just not dwelling on it, and […]

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Supporting Others

As my family goes through the grieving process for my uncle, I have been struggling with how to help them. I feel like I, of all people, should know what to do to support them. And yet, here I sit, unsure, and questioning myself. There are many articles out there on how to support people […]

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Mixed

It’s been a while, and things still aren’t slowing down a whole lot. I had my second gig with the new band last night, and it was awesome. I’ve been getting so much support from friends, and I appreciate it so much. The band is full of amazing people, and they’re so incredibly talented that […]

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Suck It Up

I know a lot of my recent posts have been about the ways in which I’m progressing. Today, I feel less like progress is happening, and more as though I’m just faking it really well. See, I still don’t eat as much as I probably should. Mostly because every time I eat, I feel sick. […]

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Self Evaluations

It’s interesting. I decided to look back at the blog posts I made a year ago, see if and how I’m doing better. Turns out I’m a lot different now than I was then. Both in predictable ways¬†–¬†ways that make sense – and in unpredictable, surprising ways. But there are still some similarities. Those are […]

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Contradictions

I know I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m now in a place where it’s really noticeable – I hold a number of completely contradictory emotions all at the same time. Right now, I’ve got several things that are going really well. Like, REALLY well. And I’m excited about them. And I’m looking forward to them. […]

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Turning Into Them

One of the phenomena that seems to be kind of common in the people who were really close to people who died by suicide is taking on some of their characteristics. It’s like those people are living the life that was cut short. I have certainly noticed myself doing that some. I’ve taken on some […]

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No News?

They say no news is good news, and in most cases, I agree. In the context of this blog, however, I’m not liking that there’s no new revelations lately. I am sick of being a broken record. Yes, everyone knows I miss Ian… That’s uninteresting at this point. With the events of last weekend, and […]

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