When people talk about anniversaries, it’s usually a good thing. Usually you’re celebrating a wonderful life event. Tomorrow is the third anniversary of Ian’s death. Far less happy. However, I have to say, three years out it’s also far less devastating. I still miss him. I’m still pissed that he’s not here. But it’s not […]

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Long Time

It has been a very long time since I posted last, and many things have changed. I suppose it’s inevitable that I have fewer and fewer things to talk about here. As time passes, healing occurs. I will forever carry with me the scar of the wound, but certainly, it stops bleeding eventually. I don’t […]

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Two Years

Two years ago today, my life changed drastically. Many peoples’ lives changed drastically. It’s amazing how big a hole one person can leave. I haven’t been paying much attention to the date, to tell the truth. There have been a large number of things distracting me from remembering the significance. Some good, some bad. All […]

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Winter Memories

In the midst of winter, it’s hard for me not to think about the time I spent with Ian during winter. It seems like most of the really intense memories happened in winter time. At the very beginning of us getting to really know each other, there was a night he got super drunk on […]

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Thanksgiving approaches, and as it does, I feel the need to speak again. Thanksgiving is a time of year when people are enticed to be thankful for things in their lives. I know several who are posting one thing they’re thankful for each day in November. I know that it’s a common tradition, around the […]

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I have been quiet lately. I don’t have much new to say, so rather than reiterate everything I’ve said, I just thought it would be better to hush. It’s been a year, seven months, and eleven┬ádays since Ian’s death, and I still do miss him every day. There are still a couple songs that I […]

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Self Worth

Low self-worth and depression go hand in hand. One can cause the other. The other can lead to the one. They tend to help each other propagate in someone’s mind. If you have the belief that you’re not worthwhile to people, that you’re just going to hurt them, that you’re useless, depression can set in […]

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Last Night I Cried

Lately, I’ve had a number of things to distract me. They’re good things, and I’m happy I have them. But I can’t help feeling that I’m ignoring the sadness, rather than dealing with it. And then I counter that argument in my head with the idea that maybe I’m just not dwelling on it, and […]

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Treating Depression

One of my dear friends, who I’ve known for a long time, recently told me that he was finally going to try to talk to someone about getting medication for depression. His doctor thought he may have disthymia (persistent, mild depression) – which is what I have – and thought that medication may help. Now, […]

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Supporting Others

As my family goes through the grieving process for my uncle, I have been struggling with how to help them. I feel like I, of all people, should know what to do to support them. And yet, here I sit, unsure, and questioning myself. There are many articles out there on how to support people […]

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